Friday, December 15, 2017

Floetry - Floetic

Eric Benét - Amazing Experience Meeting Prince, He Knew Who I Was! (247...

After the holidays

I can stop wondering why I have no plans to do anything with anyone who will be in town and why no one took advantage of the fact that I'm known for my baking and invite me to their home for Christmas with a dessert, and wondering why everyone knows me knows I'm single and lonely and haven't thought to invite me out to do anything. I don't want to come off as pathetic or pitiful and needy by hinting that I will be ordering a Large  Pepperoni Pizza from  Pizza Hutt with extra cheese  for dinner on Christmas and will make some cupcakes and will watch some dvd.  The same with NYE, except my ritual on that evening is to drink an entire bottle of champagne and eating something while watching something on Netflix, getting on my knees to pray that the following year is a better one for me in the way of love and  full-time permanent employment and finding my birth family, and getting in bed by 11pm and being sound asleep within minutes and waking up the morning of the new year.

I can't wait until 1/2/18.

What the hell did I do in a past life to deserve this life?   


I had a daughter or niece, that was of the appropriate age,  I'd get her this Barbie doll for Christmas

Prince - 36th NAACP Image Awards (2005)

Overheard on the train this morning

(a woman saying to her child who was screaming and yelling)

"I know what. Let's play that game we played last week where you were hiding and you played dead, but this time since we're on the train just play dead until we get to our stop." The boy must have thought it was a good idea because a minute later, he was quiet at least until I got off the train.

I'm in the World - Diana Ross

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Like a Unicorn

This woman, in the coffee room, says to me today:  you're like a unicorn.
I said:  what?
She said: you know, that mythological horse with a horn in the middle of its forehead that no one has ever actually seen.
I said: I know what a unicorn is. Why are you saying I'm like a unicorn?
She said: I've worked on this floor for 14 years, and I have never seen a black man on this floor. I've never seen you before. We are finally being progressive!
I said: not seeing a black man on this floor in 14 years and finally seeing one-that's being progressive?
She said: Baby steps. It took 43 presidential terms before we had Obama.

( I didn't respond. I just walked away)

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

Stravinsky: The Firebird / Gergiev · Vienna Philarmonic · Salzburg Festi...

Stravinsky appeared at the right time.
Working on the outline for my new short story Slits For The I, I wondered how I would start it.
Then 7 minutes later I realized I had written 517 words. I just read what I wrote, and I liked the story's direction.
Thanks, Stravinsky. And this glass of Kahlua on ice.

John Coltrane, Miles Davis, Kamasi Washington, Igor Stravinsky, and Prince always come through, when I need them.

What are your plans?

The future belongs to those who are passionate and work hard. 
_Paul Wellstone.

My intention is to not have a baking career, because I love baking and I don't want it to be something I had to do to make a living; I don't want to dread doing it. I bake for the love of it. If I can make  cash on the side that would be cool.  The money I get from making is divided in 2 accounts, one for saving and the other for bakeware and supplies.
 My intention is to be a successful writer. I love writing. I'd like to see at least one of my short stories on the big screen, with Halle Berry, Salli Richardson-Whitfield, Sanaa Lathan, Andre Holland, Nicole Ari Parker and Brad Pitt playing characters. Every day that I write, I write as if they are already playing the roles.
I was motivated to dream big recently when I saw a documentary on Jody Watley. As a kid, she dreamed of being a Soul Train dancer. She met a guy who could get her on the show, but he made promised that he didn't keep. She never heard from him again. Then one day she was at a party, and she was dancing. Someone there asked if she would like to be on soul train. And soon, she had become a soul train dancer. That was her dream.  The rest is history.
As far as working hard- I'm temping at an insurance company in the position that I have 20+ years of experience in, and I get there early, and I stay late, and I try to do twice what my fellow temp coworkers do. When my boss asks the person who checks in on the temps, how we're  doing, I want him to say, 'well Lindsey and Sandra will sit and do personal stuff until I give them something to do, but Alieux, he will go in my work queue to take work to do when his queue is empty. He will also let me know that he's taking some groups, which I appreciate.'     I love Small Group Underwriting. It's what I've been doing 20+ years. I'm passionate about it and I'm  hard-worker I want them to hire me for a full-time permanent position. God-willing.
I'd like to find love too, but that's another story.

What are your plans for the future? 

Sunday, December 10, 2017

Mr Jukes - Grant Green ft. Charles Bradley

Me and my desserts

are also on Instagram!

Follow me at ACakeSupreme to check out all of my desserts, and if you're local and you see something you like, contact me at and place an order.

Christmas is coming up soon!

Even if you're across the pond or on the other side of the planet, follow me anyway!

Never give up.

The test of success is not what you do when you are on top. Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom.   --General George S Patton
 This is a group of people who were at rock bottom, yet worked hard and eventually became immensely successful. They showed that when things look their worst, the only way left is up.

J.K. Rowling had just gotten a divorce, was on government aid, and could barely afford to feed her baby in 1994, just three years before the first Harry Potter book, Harry Potter and The Philosopher’s Stone, was published. When she was shopping it out, she was so poor she couldn’t afford a computer or even the cost of photocopying the 90,000-word novel, so she manually typed out each version to send to publishers. It was rejected dozens of times until finally Bloomsbury, a small London publisher, gave it a second chance after the CEO’s eight year-old daughter fell in love with it. The rest is history.

Tyler Perry had a rough childhood. He was physically and sexually abused growing up, got kicked out of high school, and tried to commit suicide twice—once as a preteen and again at 22. At 23 he moved to Atlanta and took up odd jobs as he started working on his stage career. In 1992 he wrote, produced, and starred in his first theater production, I Know I’ve Been Changed, somewhat informed by his difficult upbringing. Perry put all his savings into the show and it failed miserably; the run lasted just one weekend and only 30 people came to watch. He kept up with the production, working more odd jobs and often slept in his car to get by. Six years later, Perry finally broke through when, on its seventh run, the show became a success. He’s since gone on to have an extremely successful career as a director, writer, and actor. In fact, Perry was named Forbes’ highest paid man in entertainment in 2011.

Steven King was broke and struggling when he was first trying to write. He lived in a trailer with his wife—also a writer—and they both worked multiple jobs to support their family while pursuing their craft. They were so poor they had to borrow clothes for their wedding and had gotten rid of the telephone because it was too expensive.
King received so many rejection letters for his works that he developed a system for collecting them. In his book On Writing, he recalls: “By the time I was 14...the nail in my wall would no longer support the weight of the rejection slips impaled upon it. I replaced the nail with a spike and kept on writing.” He received 60 rejections before selling his first short story, "The Glass Floor," for $35. Even his now best-selling book, Carrie, wasn’t a hit at first. After dozens of rejections, he finally sold it for a meager advance to Doubleday Publishing, where the hardback sold only 13,000 copies—not great. Soon after, though, Signet Books signed on for the paperback rights for $400,000, $200,000 of which went to King. Success achieved!

Oprah’s dealt with a lot throughout her public life—criticism about her weight, racism, intrusive questions about her sexuality, just to name a few—but she never let it get in the way of her ambition and drive. When you look at her childhood, her personal triumphs are cast in an even more remarkable light.
Growing up, Oprah was reportedly a victim of sexual abuse and was repeatedly molested by her cousin, an uncle, and a family friend. Later, she became pregnant and gave birth to a child at age 14, who passed away just two weeks later. But Oprah persevered, going on to finish high school as an honors student, earning a full scholarship to college, and working her way up through the ranks of television, from a local network anchor in Nashville to an international superstar and creator of her OWN network.

Did you know that Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team? Michael Jordan quote, "I've failed over and over again in my life, and that is why I succeed."


PRINCE .... Cloreen BaconSkin

Saturday, December 2, 2017

the blackest part

of me
I’m not talking about the blackest part of the eye
Through which we all see,
The pupil.
No, but,
The blackest part of the eye  through which I see you
Seeing you from my perspective
You come for me with petty bullshit
And I will deflect that petty bullshit
With the blackest part of me
Landing words that cause more damage than fists.
More truth than lie
Longer lasting.
I bend over backwards
To appease.
I do what I need to do to pay my rent,
Keep the shit up and
You will see
The part you won’t recognize:
The blackest blackest part of me.
Giving you a black eye
In your black eye.
And I won’t even have to touch you.
you’re already intimidated by my presence anyway.
feeling threatened
feeling unconfortable by my asking questions
others are too afraid to ask to get their job done.
You see,
others would rather talk about you,
but I’d rather  talk to you.
My heart
My soul-

Wanna see?


Thursday, November 30, 2017

The Soul Cypher | Soul Train Awards

Tasia did that!

Yuna - Crush ft. Usher

I know I've posted this video clip a few times. I love this song. There's someone about the dude's eyes when he sees the sista for the first time, that gets me every time.

Wednesday, November 29, 2017

23 and me

My birthday present to myself was the purchase of one kit from 23 and me.  For those that don't know, 23andMe is a privately held personal genomics and biotechnology company based in Mountain View, California. The company is named for the 23 pairs of chromosomes in a normal human cell. They had a Thanksgiving sale. Normally the kit is $99.00, but they're selling for $69.00.
in the mail in about 5-7 business days, I will receive a tube that I will need to spit in and mail to them. Within weeks they will tell me what region of the world to which my DNA can by traced. They will also compile names and addresses of people related to me by blood.  
I was curious because years ago I paid to get the same information from their competitor. I'm wondering if the results will be the same or similar. I was also curious because a friend in Manchester UK discovered he had a brother who lived in nearby Oldham, UK. All his life  he wanted a brother and heard his parents gave up a younger son. And there he was, 8.3 miles away. 
Having been supposedly born in Brooklyn and raised there until 13 when we moved to Wisconsin, it wold be great to know if the older brother or sister  I heard I had ( or any cousins) was alive and well in New York, and was looking for me as well. 


i thought it was
I thought it was
Us 2.
The sum of youandmeequaling

                      the beginning
of  we
. ensconsed
the other’s psyche.
the comfort level.
Our us we
no need to walk on tiptoe anymore/ us.
I’m comfortable,
You see, I thought love had arrived in the form of you

I really thought it was.
the decision.
the time.
the place
thinking the seed could be laid.
     Anticipating growth.
     Anticipating youandi        the bloom
Of callalilies
My favorites
Your favorites
Our us we/
You decided to be honest
 you wanted
dandelions instead
the ones trampled on by thousands of people on their way to and from work.
Rooted laying on its side on the sidework
No where nesr dirt.

Tell me what do I do with what’s been planted


There is/was no us. Just a poem I wrote up.  This is a rough draft.

H.E.R. - Jungle (Remix)

H.E.R. - Focus

Monday, November 27, 2017

Miss Jamaica Wore an Afro at Miss Universe 2017, and I was SO Here for It

At the 2017 Miss Universe pageant, Miss Jamaica Davina Bennett became the talk of the night for wearing an Afro.
She stood out among the sea of blown-out, straight styles you typically see on beauty queens and was celebrated across social media for proudly wearing her natural hair, especially considering how we still hear stories about women being told their curls are "inappropriate" at work and school.

 Even if Davina ultimately didn't win the crown (she was in the top three, named second runner-up), seeing her on stage wearing her Afro throughout the competition was a major win for inclusivity.

The 23-year-old model and philanthropist has been outspoken about wanting to shatter existing Eurocentric beauty standards.

"I did not win but I got what I was seeking," she wrote on instagram
following the competition,
 "I stand as the first Afro queen to have made it thus far."
In an interview with Jamaica Observer in September, when asked which beauty stereotypes
needed to be challenged, she responded, "Short, natural hair which I feel should be embraced more, and not ignored."

courtesy  pop sugar.

I stood up and applauded every time they called her name, as she progressed in the competition. When she became one of the final three, I was prepared to jump and down if she won.
But she was the second runner up. 
 I then turned the tv off and I went to bed. 


And then

--and then when I stopped calling or texting some of them, I never heard from some of them ever again. 

And I began communicating  with those whom I didn't have to chase.

Saturday, November 25, 2017

Miles Maeda - Live at Smartbar '02

My friend Benjamin turned me on to DJ Miles Maeda back in 1998.  I love this DJ still, even today.

There are alot of things I need.
I need a party. I need an escape, I need to forget my troubles for one night. I need to not just nod my head to the beat. I need to connect with someone. I need to dance. It's been over 10 years. That's right; close to about 15 years. I lived in Silver Spring at the time. My friends and I would go to The District every weekend, and Baltimore sometimes with Shakara (until we got kicked out of a bar because she got in a fight with a female who wouldn't leave me alone) and Vandana, and I'd go with my housemate to Manhattan or Atlantic City every other weekend.
Those were the days

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

On my other birthday


I'm celebrating by playing my favorite songs

And I'm going to take myself out to dinner.

Currently reading

From my brother from another mother  ( and dad)

I'm currently reading;

Saturday, November 11, 2017


Up until 12 years ago, I always celebrated my birthday on November 11. As a child I always was disappointed because my mother would always celebrate my birthday 3 days later. I always thought that she forgot my birthday. I didn't say anything to her about it when I was a kid.
My mother has a razor-sharp memory; when I discovered 12 years ago from my nephew that I was adopted. I confronted my mother about it, and when she said it was true, I asked 'when is my birthday?'
She said , "I think it's November 14."

My birth certificate says November 11.  I discovered my handwritten birth certificate isn't my original birth certificate. My birth certificate is sealed, along with my birth  and adoption records for reasons the state of New York refuses to let me know.  You know the story. I've mentioned this a few times.
My guess is that my information was written on this revised one, and whoever wrote it mistaken the '4' for a '1'; instead of 14 they wrote 11.

So, until I find out for sure the date I was born, I will celebrate it on the 11th and the 14th of November.

I don't mind. I get to celebrate my birthday 2 times a year.

Friday, November 10, 2017

Al lI know is

that God does exist, because whenever my back is up against the wall, I pray to the only God that I know, and every single time, a way is made for me. Every single time.

I will be starting a 2 month assignment at a company where I've been wanting to work. I will be doing what I've doing my entire work career- small group underwriting.  There might be an extension.  My goal is to get to work early every day, put in overtime if they ask, even work saturdays if they ask. I'm going to be friendly, receptive, eager, and every positive adjective I can think of. I hope to be so good a fit for the company that my 2 month assignment is extended and eventually they hire me as a permanent fulltime employee.

I interviewed for the full time position in June of this year. I didn't get it.  Three weeks ago, I emailed the manager I interviewed and asked to be considered for any small group underwriting opportunities in the future.
A week later, his assistant called me with the offer to work a couple months at least, with a really high hourly pay. After the call, I got on my knees and I praised God. I know He did it. I know He put it in my mind to send that boss an email. His assistant said he said my interview was memorable, and the email stood out.


I believe you learn your best lessons when you're not expecting to learn. 

- Rodrigo Miercoles

Tom Tom Club - Genius of Love

Tuesday, November 7, 2017


This evening when I was sitting down on the train on my way home, I watched as the train began to fill up with people at each stop when the doors open, and I offered my seat to any of the three woman standing in front of me. All three smiled, and two said they only had a few stops, and the other said she had been sitting down all day and she actually wanted to stand, but thanks anyway.
This lady behind me tapped me on the shoulder. I turned around. She said:
"What a nice gentleman you are!"
Me: Thanks.
Her: You were obviously raised to respect women.
Me: True. I'd like to think that some gentleman would offer my mother or sister their seat.
Her: What mosque do you attend?
Me: I'm Christian.
Her: Christian?
Me: Yeah.
Her: You're a Christian?
Me: Yep.
Her: That's odd.
Me: How is it odd?
Her: Because you offered those ladies your seat. Every time I've seen a man do gentlemanly things, they always end up being Muslim or Atheist. Yesterday I saw a man-he looked like a priest, race a woman who had a little boy with her, and she was carrying a bag of groceries, to an empty seat and he sat down.
Me: I don't know what to say.