Thursday, October 19, 2017


In the best stories there's a part where the hero decides enough is enough. I love that part.

-A. George

The effects of Him.


don't forget the bottles
of muscatel clanking

in yards of broken champagne flute glasses
and lost memories of celebratory toasts;
slobbering stammering and stuttering a language;
the C' word.
in a pitch low enough that only other alcoholics can interpret.
in a pitch high enough that only other dogs can hear.

brought into this world in handcuffs,
still I stutter;
a life in restraints.
shy by history.

(begins with a C')

This giant of a man. At five feet seven.

Back in the 50's
who has often been found drunk,
in ditches in Memphis Tennessee)

Don't bother mom;
She's busy doing twice what you're too drunk to do once:
work. love.
And he may hurt me even more when she ain't around.
I'm no fool.
I'll be quiet

(no, not me. Him.

Begins with a C')

You see,
there is history in these handcuffs.
There is pain.
the truth.
there is blood,
but there are no screams-
that's for sissies.

let's not forget the small green bottles hidden in pockets of suits and winter coats at Deliverence Evangelical Church, New York, New York:
the back turned slightly.
the contents quickly swallowed while mom obliviously praise God.
but I'm praising God too,
with one eye
and I see everything
he did.
But God is omnipotent.
Praise Him!

the clapping which was not for support. ( God,
please get me out of the audience )

The "C word.
We laugh
We cry
We're in the audience
But sis has a different interpretation of what we're both observing.
/ I must have done something wrong.
apparently I must have asked to be born
to whom I was born/
before I was born
(God, remove my restraints)
Learning everything by
Listening to big bunches of nothing
From enemies who are close friends of each other
In time of need going their separate ways after bartime,
But sister, playing with dolls in the living room says 'leave my daddy alone.'
while the back of my neck is pressed down to keep my back bent over the ironing board
as the other hand holds a thick black leather belt to slam against my naked ass
while the supremes song, 'where did our love go?' is playing on the radio,
the beat-down is only shortly interrupted by the announcement that Martin Luther King Jr was just shot..

The effects of him.
of him and those damn bottles...

& amp;
if he stood still for a minute and listened
& amp; watched
& amp; cared,
he could have heard the slow seeping out of what ever volume of love my little heart contained.
I petitioned.
I begged for compassion.
In between slaps and scalding hot baths.
In between humiliation, emasculation and degradation.
Cirrhosis; that's it.

The effects of him.

1 across the face back hand
2 across the face slap
3 a bath in scalding water. Steam rising off the ankles.
4 slap
5 you damn sissy slap
6 stop fucking crying you damn mama's boy slap
7 slap
8 Shut up! Don't be a sissy! Slap
9 back hand slap Be a man!
10 years old.... Applause.

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

End scene...

I was brought into this world and delivered to someone else handcuffed

           1996 may he rest in peace
handcuffs still on
(where's the key?)
handcuffs off




Stevie Wonder - Joy Inside My Tears

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

N'Dea Davenport - Bullshittin'

Reasons "The Star Spangled Banner" shouldn't be honoured by black people

Regarding our national anthem, “The Star-Spangled Banner,” perhaps not knowing the full lyrics is a good thing. It is one of the most racist, pro-slavery, anti-black songs in the American lexicon, and you would be wise to cut it from your Fourth of July playlist.

“The Star-Spangled Banner,” as most Americans know it, is only a couple of lines. In fact, if you look up the song on Google, only the most famous lyrics pop up on page 1;

Oh say can you see,
By the dawn's early light,
What so proudly we hailed,
At the twilight's last gleaming?

Whose broad stripes and bright stars,
Through the perilous fight,
O'er the ramparts we watched,
Were so gallantly streaming.

And thy rocket's red glare,
Thy bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through thee night,
That our flag was still there.

Oh say does that star spangled banner yet wave,
O'er the land of the free, and the home of the brave.

The story, as most of us are told, is that Francis Scott Key was a prisoner on a British ship during the War of 1812 and wrote this poem while watching the American troops battle back the invading British in Baltimore. That—as is the case with 99 percent of history that is taught in public schools and regurgitated by the mainstream press—is less than half the story.

To understand the full “Star-Spangled Banner” story, you have to understand the author. Key was an aristocrat and city prosecutor in Washington, D.C. He was, like most enlightened men at the time, not against slavery; he just thought that since blacks were mentally inferior, masters should treat them with more Christian kindness. He supported sending free blacks (not slaves) back to Africa and, with a few exceptions, was about as pro-slavery, anti-black and anti-abolitionist  as you could get at the time.

Of particular note was Key’s opposition to the idea of the Colonel Marines. The Marines were a battalion of runaway slaves who joined with the British  Royal Army in exchange for their freedom. The Marines were not only a terrifying example of what slaves would do if given the chance, but also a repudiation of the white superiority that men like Key were so invested in.

All of these ideas and concepts came together around Aug. 24, 1815, at the Battle of Bladensburg, where Key, who was serving as a lieutenant at the time, ran into a battalion of Colonial Marines. His troops were taken to the woodshed by the very black folks he disdained, and he fled back to his home in Georgetown to lick his wounds. The British troops, emboldened by their victory in Bladensburg, then marched into Washington, D.C., burning the Library of Congress, the Capitol Building and the White House. You can imagine that Key was very much in his feelings seeing black soldiers trampling on the city he so desperately loved.

A few weeks later, in September of 1815, far from being a captive, Key was on a British boat begging for the release of one of his friends, a doctor named William Beanes. Key was on the boat waiting to see if the British would release his friend when he observed the bloody battle of Fort McHenry in Baltimore on Sept. 13, 1815. America lost the battle but managed to inflict heavy casualties on the British in the process. This inspired Key to write “The Star-Spangled Banner” right then and there, but no one remembers that he wrote a full third stanza decrying the former slaves who were now working for the British army:

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore,
That the havoc of war and the battle’s confusion
A home and a Country should leave us no more?
Their blood has wash’d out their foul footstep’s pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave,
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

In other words, Key was saying that the blood of all the former slaves and “hirelings” on the battlefield will wash away the pollution of the British invaders. With Key still bitter that some black soldiers got the best of him a few weeks earlier, “The Star-Spangled Banner” is as much a patriotic song as it is a diss track to black people who had the audacity to fight for their freedom. Perhaps that’s why it took almost 100 years for the song to become the national anthem.

It might be a good idea to switch up your Fourth of July patriotic playlist.

It's not on any of my playlists, knowing what I know now; it's hard for me to pledge allegiance to a song about the land of the free when people who look like me are still being murdered by the supposed enforcers of the law-(the largest gang in America) on a daily basis, 100% of which are never ever punished; the murderers get to live their life free  (just another day in the office) as if the murders never occurred while those affected by the murders are left mourning and fighting for justice, and suffering.

While some people agree that there should be a protest of sorts, the jury is still out on how they would like us to protest social injustice. It's as if we need to ask permission to do so.

America has a long history of athletes using their high-profile status to protest against the government and its policies. Ahead, a few of the most prominent examples.

1967: Muhammad Ali
A group of top African American athletes from different sporting disciplines gather to give support and hear the boxer Muhammad Ali give his reasons for rejecting the draft during the Vietnam War in Cleveland, June 4, 1967.

World champion boxer Muhammad Ali used his worldwide star power to take a stand against the Vietnam War by refusing to enlist in the military.
"I ain’t got no quarrel with those Vietcong," he said at the time, a stance that left him with a five-year prison sentence for draft evasion, a $10,000 fine, and a ban from boxing for three years, .
Ali appealed the conviction, claiming he qualified for conscientious-objector status because he opposed the war as a Muslim.
"My conscience won’t let me go shoot my brother, or some darker people, or some poor hungry people in the mud for big powerful America,"Ali said in 1967. "How can I shoot them poor people? Just take me to jail."
He avoided jail time as his case was successfully appealed, but he was stripped of his championship title for refusing to join the armed forces in Vietnam.
Ali’s conviction for evading the draft made it all the way up to the Supreme Court, but in 1971, the Supreme Court overturned the ruling.
In retrospect, one of the costs of Ali courageously standing his ground for his beliefs was that the three-year ban robbed him of some of his prime boxing years, his trainer Angelo Dundee told ESPN
in 2012.

1968: Tommie Smith and John Carlos

Athletes Tommie Smith, center, and John Carlos stare downward during the playing of "The Star-Spangled Banner" after Smith received the gold and Carlos the bronze medal in the 200 meter run at the Summer Olympic Games in Mexico City.

After winning gold in the 200-meter sprint at the 1968 Summer Olympics in Mexico City, Tommie Smith raised his fist in the air alongside his teammate and bronze medalist, John Carlos. Smith and Carlos claimed that they used the gesture to symbolize black power and to demonstrate against racism and injustice.
The pair later said that every detail of the act was strategically planned between the two of them, from which hands they chose to the scarves and beads they wore. As Smith explained to ABC Sports announcer Howard Cosell, "My raised right hand stood for the power in black America. Carlos' raised left hand stood for the unity of black America. Together they formed an arch of unity and power.”
"If I win, I am an American, not a black American. But if I did something bad, then they would say 'a Negro.' We are black and we are proud of being black," Smith said at the press conference after their demonstration.
"Black America will understand what we did tonight," Smith added.
Peter Norman, the Australian silver medalist who stood next to the men on the podium, also wore an Olympic Project for Human Rights pin to show support for Smith and Carlos.
Two days after their protest, Smith and Carlos were suspended from the national team and sent back to the U.S. The pair were met by sharp criticism and even threats when they returned home.

1972: Jackie Robinson
Jackie Robinson's stance at bat while while working out with Montreal Royals during training at Stanford, Fla.

After breaking the color barrier in Major League Baseball, Jackie Robinson wrote in his 1972 autobiography, I Never Had it Made, "I cannot stand and sing the national anthem," admitting that he didn’t sing the anthem when he stood for it before baseball games. This was his silent protest.
Branch Rickey, the baseball executive that signed him onto the Dodgers, made an agreement with Robinson that he would not respond to racial slurs and hate.
“I want a man who has the courage not to fight, not to fight back,” Rickey famously said to Robinson. With that, Robinson stayed quiet until his retirement.
After retirement, Robinson spoke out about racial injustice and became a leader in the Civil Rights movement.
"I'm not fooled because I've had a chance open to very few Negro Americans," said Robinson when he testified before Congress about racial injustice.

2014: NBA Teams
Jackie Robinson's stance at bat while working out with Montreal Royals during training at Stanford, Fla.

NBA teams first broke dress code rules back in 2014 to protest police brutality, wearing “I Can’t Breathe” shirts during warm-ups. The shirts referenced the last words of Eric Garner before he died at the hands of a police officer in Staten Island. Lebron James and Kobe Bryant, among other players, wore the shirts before preseason games.

2016 WNBA Teams

During the summer of 2016, the women of the WNBA silently protested by wearing shirts that supported Black Lives Matter to game warm-ups.
Members of the New York Liberty basketball team stand during the playing of the Star Spangled Banner prior to a game against the Atlanta Dream, July 13, 2016, in New York.

The Minnesota Lynx wore shirts that read: “Change starts with us – Justice & Accountability” on the front and listed the names of two men who had been fatally shot by police, Philando Castile and Alton Sterling, on the back, according to ESPN. 
New York Liberty wore shirts  that read #BlackLivesMatter, #Dallas5, and a blank hashtag, which represented future victims of police brutality, during their game warm-ups.

The Indiana Fever and Phoenix Mercury also wore shirts in protest against recent police shootings of black men, and the entire Indiana Fever team and some Mercury players knelt in protest  during the national anthem.

The WNBA fined the teams, saying that league rules state that uniforms may not be altered in any way. But after public outcry over the fines, which were $5,000 to each organization and an additional $500 to the team members, the WNBA rescinded them.
The league's president, Lisa Borders, later said on Twitter she had done so to show that the league supported "players expressing themselves on matters important to them."

2016 Colin Kaepernick

Members of the New York Liberty basketball team stand during the playing of the Star Spangled Banner prior to a game against the Atlanta Dream, July 13, 2016, in New York.

San Francisco 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick first sat during the national in August 2016. He later began kneeling before games to protest police brutality, starting before a game against the Green Bay Packers on Sept. 1, 2016.
Teammate Eric Reid expressed support of Kaepernick’s message and approached him to strategize together.

At a press conference, Kaepernick explained "Me and Eric had many conversations and he approached me and said 'I support what you’re doing, I support what your message is, let’s think about how we can do this together.' We talked about it at length and we wanted to make sure the message that we’re trying to send isn’t lost with the actions that come along with it."
"I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color," Kaepernick  told NFL Media after taking a knee. 
"To me, this is bigger than football and it would be selfish on my part to look the other way. There are bodies in the street and people getting paid leave and getting away with murder."
At the beginning of March, Kaepernick opted out of his contract with the 49ers, making him a free agent. Kaepernick remains unsigned, and some accuse the NFL of blacklisting him, ESPN reported.  

-Makes sense to me.

-courtesy, The and

That Melanin Tho